Tweets
Here are our weekly Tweet Suggestions! Come back next week!
LINKS
-Can’t even eat in peace around here… http://icanhascheezburger.files.wordpress.com/2007/11/funny-pictures-nuts-birds.jpg [pic]
- Dog saying bedtime prayers http://ihasahotdog.files.wordpress.com/2008/03/funny-dog-pictures-praying-dog-boy-bed.jpg [pic]
- Lovin’ life http://www.icseguess.com/uploads/images/funny-05.jpg [pic]
- How rumors start in the office http://images.zwani.com/graphics/funny_pictures/images/funny-pictures155.jpg [pic]
- Peanut butter anyone? http://i0006.photobucket.com/albums/0006/findstuff22/Best%20Images/Funny/FUNNY-THUMB.jpg [pic]
- One for the guys… http://www.funnypicturefunnyphoto.com/funny-picture-photo-toilet-mural-dark-mephi-pic.jpg [pic]
- Tough night last night? http://funnyhot.net/pics/funny-animals/funny_animals_37.jpg [pic]
- Funny shoes http://www.funny-potato.com/funny-shoes.html [pics]
- High five – er – four kitty http://www.2funnycats.com/files/media/Cat-Hi-Five.jpg [pic]
GOALS
- It is amazing what you can accomplish if you do not care who gets the credit.
- The greatest dreams are always unrealistic.
- You must have long-range goals to keep you from being frustrated by short-range failures.
- Many are stubborn in pursuit of the path they have chosen, few in pursuit of the goal.
- The world is moving so fast these days that the man who says it can’t be done is generally interrupted by someone doing it.
- We’re still not where we’re going, but we’re not where we were.
- Arriving at one goal is the starting point to another.
- The young do not know enough to be prudent, and therefore they attempt the impossible – and achieve it, generation after generation.
- As long as I have a want, I have a reason for living. Satisfaction is death.
- If you aim at nothing, you’ll hit it every time.
- Vision without action is a daydream. Action with without vision is a nightmare.
- When the horse is dead, get off.
- If you want to make your dreams come true, the first thing you have to do is wake up.
- Great ideas need landing gear as well as wings.
- Life’s problems wouldn’t be called hurdles if there wasn’t a way to get over them.
PERSEVERANCE
- The difference between perseverance and obstinacy is that one comes from a strong will, and the other from a strong won’t.
- The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking places.
- When the world says, Give up, Hope whispers, Try it one more time.
- When you come to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on.
- Consider the postage stamp: its usefulness consists in the ability to stick to one thing till it gets there.
- The greatest oak was once a little nut who held its ground.
- Fall seven times, stand up eight.
- Perseverance is the hard work you do after you get tired of doing the hard work you already did.
- If one dream should fall and break into a thousand pieces, never be afraid to pick one of those pieces up and begin again.
- He conquers who endures.
- Stubbornly persist, and you will find that the limits of your stubbornness go well beyond the stubbornness of your limits.
- You can’t go through life quitting everything. If you’re going to achieve anything, you’ve got to stick with something.
DO SOMETHING
- I have always thought the actions of men the best interpreters of their thoughts. ~John Locke
- Well done is better than well said.
- Between saying and doing many a pair of shoes is worn out.
- After all is said and done, a lot more will have been said than done.
- The shortest answer is doing.
- Trust only movement. Life happens at the level of events, not of words. Trust movement.
- Action always generates inspiration. Inspiration seldom generates action.
- A promise is a cloud; fulfillment is rain.
- An idea not coupled with action will never get any bigger than the brain cell it occupied.
- Inspirations never go in for long engagements; they demand immediate marriage to action.
- Small deeds done are better than great deeds planned.
Previous weeks:
LINKS
Noooo comment… http://www.zwani.com/graphics/funny_pictures/images/funny-pictures99.jpg [pic]
Slippery Ice http://www.innocentenglish.com/cute-animals/funny-animal-pics/funny-polar-bear-pic-img121.jpg [pic]
8 ridiculous (and funny!) ads http://www.innocentenglish.com/img/funny-newspaper-ads-mistakes-and-bloopers.jpg [pic]
Is this your website designer? http://www.floridaventureblog.com/uploaded_images/funny-sign.jpg [pic]
I have a funny feeling this marriage won’t last… http://www.funny-potato.com/images/wedding/funny-wedding.jpg [pic]
QUOTES:
- You must be the change you wish to see in the world. ~Mahatma Ghandi
- Act as if what you do makes a difference. It does. ~William James
- A candle loses none of its light by lighting another candle
- Do not wait for leaders; do it alone, person to person. ~Mother Teresa
- Never do anything against conscience even if the state demands it. ~Albert Einstein
GOALS:
- The reason you may never reach your goals is because you don’t seriously consider them as believable or achievable.
- Winners can tell you where they are going, what they plan to do along the way, and who will be sharing the adventure with them.
- Our goals can only be reached with a plan, a fervent belief and vigorous action. There is no other route to success.
- When we are motivated by goals that have deep meaning, then we truly live life.
- You must have long term goals to keep you from being frustrated by short term failures.
- Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off your goals.
- If you don’t know what harbor you’re sailing to, then no wind is the right wind.
- Choosing a goal and sticking to it changes everything.
- Goals determine what you’re going to be.
- Think little goals and expect little achievements. Think big goals and win big success.
- Progress has little to do with speed, but much to do with direction.
- It takes a person with a mission to succeed.
- Set your goals high, and don’t stop until you get there.
- Success is the progressive realization of a worthy goal or ideal.
- Your dreams are the road maps that guide you and show you what is possible for your life.
LINKS
How to Make Eggnog Grog http://www.wikihow.com/Make-Eggnog-Grog
How to Make a Paper Napkin Flower With a Plastic Straw http://www.wikihow.com/Make-a-Paper-Napkin-Flower-With-a-Plastic-Straw
How to Decorate a Gift With Plastic Straws http://www.wikihow.com/Decorate-a-Gift-With-Plastic-Straws
How to Make Ginger Ale http://www.wikihow.com/Make-Ginger-Ale
How to Brew Cheap Wine http://www.wikihow.com/Brew-Cheap-Wine
How to Make Kool Aid Wine http://www.wikihow.com/Make-Kool-Aid-Wine
How to Practice Mindfulness http://www.wikihow.com/Practice-Mindfulness For Peace over the holidays and beyond
How to Cope With Post Holiday Syndrome http://www.wikihow.com/Cope-With-Post-Holiday-Syndrome
How to Make and Keep New Year’s Resolutions http://www.wikihow.com/Make-and-Keep-New-Year%27s-Resolutions
How to Transform Yourself for the New Year http://www.wikihow.com/Transform-Yourself-for-the-New-Year
Pigeon transfers data faster than South Africa’s ISP http://www.news.com.au/technology/pigeon-transfers-data-faster-than-south-africas-telkom/story-e6frfro0-1225771449209
FOR A SMILE
Every time I open my mouth, some idiot starts talking.
I plan to live forever. So far, so good!
Knowledge is power, and power corrupts. So study hard and be evil.
Veni, Vidi, Velcro. I came, I saw, I stuck around.
On the journey of life, I choose the psycho path.
On your mark, get set, go away!
The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it’s still on the list.
My drinking team has a bowling problem.
Time is what keeps everything from happening at once.
I had the right to remain silent, but I didn’t have the ability.
To err is human, to blame it on somebody else shows management potential.
Liberal Arts major: will think for food.
Stoplights timed for 30 mph are also timed for 60 mph.
I didn’t climb all the way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian.
Don’t treat me any differently than you would the Queen.
What we need is a patch for stupidity!
Wrinkled was not one of the things I wanted to be when I grew up!
I fought the lawn, and the lawn won.
If you can’t read this, thank the teacher’s union.
I have a degree in Liberal Arts – do you want fries with that?
Suburbia: Where they tear out the trees and name streets after them.
If you were born again, would you have two bellybuttons?
A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.
Who are these children, and why do they keep calling me Mom?
The trouble with life is there’s no background music.
Quoting one is plagiarism. Quoting many is research.
Therapy is expensive. Popping bubble wrap is cheap. You choose.
If you are what you eat, I’m fast, cheap and easy.
Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.
Warning: Dates on calendar are closer than they appear.
Sarcasm is just one more service I offer.
Stress is when you wake up screaming and you realize you weren’t asleep.
There’s no place like 127.0.0.1
I’m supposed to back up my hard drive, but how do I put it into reverse?
Chaos, panic, and disorder – my work here is done.
Is it time for your medication or mine?
If you want breakfast in bed, sleep in the kitchen.
To err is human, to forgive divine. Neither is government policy.
God made us sisters; Prozac made us friends.
JUST THE FACTS
The odds are 1 in 582 that you will be injured in a traffic accident due to driver distraction. – The Week Magazine
Niger (Africa) has the world’s highest fertility rate – 7.1 children per mother. – Newsweek, 10/19/09
By 2040, 40% of Japan’s population will be senior citizens. – Newsweek
On average (in July 2009), there are six job seekers for each job opening in the United States. – Fortune
Americans; odds are 1 in 40 that you’re currently in the U.S. criminal justice system (incarcerated, parole, or probation)
Unmarried women now account for 40% of births. – Newsweek
47% of all U.S. households will owe no federal income tax in 2009. – The Week Magazine
Prostitutes in Chicago, Illinois are more likely to have sex with a police officer than be arrested by one. – Newsweek
22,000 Americans die annually because they lack health insurance. – Newsweek
The United States is the only developed nation where medical bankruptcies occur. – Newsweek
Motivational Quotes
You never get a second chance to make a good first impression. –Unknown
An open mind opens doors. –Unknown
Above all else, never think you’re not good enough. –Anthony Trollope
Do what you will, always. –Dave Matthews Band
Think happy thoughts and you can fly. –Peter Pan
Yes, you can be a dreamer and a doer too, if you will remove one word from your vocabulary: impossible. –Unknown
I will not follow where the path may lead, but I will go where there is no path, and I will leave a trail. –Muriel Strade
Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly. –Robert F. Kennedy
I would rather make my name than inherit it. –W.M. Thackeray
I don’t know who my grandfather was; I am much more concerned to know who his grandson will be. –Abraham Lincoln
Do not miss the purpose of this life, and do not wait for circumstance to mold or change your fate. –Ella Wheeler Wilcox
Your day will go the way the corners of your mouth turn. –Unknown
Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you have imagined. –Henry David Thoreau
A great pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do! –Walter Bagehot
You can sit around and wait for the good things to happen to you, or you can go out and make them happen. –Unknown
It is during our darkest moments that we must focus to see the light. –Taylor Benson
HUMOROUS QUOTES
He moves like a parody between a majorette girl and Fred Astaire. -Truman Capote on Mick Jagger
Most of the time he sounds like he has a mouth full of toilet paper. -Rex Reed talking about Marlon Brando
Spielberg isn’t a filmmaker, he’s a confectioner. -Alex Cox on Steven Spielberg
It’s like kissing Hitler. -Tony Curtis talking about Marilyn Monroe
I believe that Ronald Reagan can make this country what it once was – an Arctic region covered with ice. -Steve Martin
Is he just doing a bad Elvis pout, or was he born that way? -Freddie Mercury on Billy Idol
I knew right away that Rock Hudson was gay when he did not fall in love with me. -Gina Lollogrigida on Rock Hudson
If everything seems under control, you’re just not going fast enough. -Mario Andretti.
Sure, luck means a lot in football. Not having a good quarterback is bad luck. -Don Schula.
Nobody has ever bet enough on a winning horse. -Richard Sasuly.
Show me a man who is a good loser and I’ll show you a man who is playing golf with his boss. -Jim Murray.
Some people think football is a matter of life and death. I assure you, it’s much more serious than that. -Bill Shankly. .
Sure, there have been deaths and injuries in boxing, but none of them serious. -Alan Winter.
Boxing is a lot of white men watching two black men beat each other up. -Muhammad Ali.
It took me seventeen years to get three thousand hits in baseball. I did it in one afternoon playing golf. -Henry Aaron. .
Moving from Wales to Italy is like moving to a different country. -Ian Rush.
If at first you don’t succeed… So much for skydiving. -Henry Youngman.
If you’re playing a poker game and you look around the table and and can’t tell who the sucker is, it’s you. -Paul Newman.
In Russia, if a male athelete loses he becomes a female athelete. -Yakov Smirnoff.
I’ve seen George Foreman shadow boxing and the shadow won. -Muhammad Ali.
One way to stop a runaway horse is to bet on him. -Jeffrey Bernard.
Ally MacLeod thinks that tactics are a new kind of mint. -Billy Connolly.
Winning isn’t everything: It’s the only thing. -Vincent Lombardi.
I call everyone ‘Darling’ because I can’t remember their names. -Zsa Zsa Gabor
In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man; if you want anything done, ask a woman. -Margaret Thatcher
When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. -Elaine Boosler
I base most of my fashion taste on what doesn’t itch. -Gilda Radner
Behind every successful man is a surprised woman. -Marion Pearson
I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man I keep his house. -Zsa Zsa Gabor
The length of a film should be directly related to the endurance of the human bladder. -Alfred Hitchcock.
When did I realize I was God? Well, I was praying and I suddenly realized I was talking to myself. -Peter O’Toole.
This film cost $31 million. With that kind of money I could have invaded some country. -Clint Eastwood.
I don’t want any yes-men around me. I want everyone to tell me the truth–even if it costs him his job. -Samuel Goldwyn.
Who the [heck] wants to hear actors talk? -H.M. Warner, Warner Brothers, 1927.
In Hollywood, if you don’t have happiness you send out for it. -Rex Reed.
Shoot a few scenes out of focus. I want to win the foreign film award. -Billy Wilder.
